Welcome to the June Noizeletter! I’m all over the place this month. On to the Top Five Noizy Thingz…
(1) New National Booking Agent!
I have a new national Booking Secret Agent and she rocks. Her name is Lisa Shara and she can’t stop booking shows for me. Actually, it’s getting kind of annoying. For example, I am currently playing 16 shows in 4 states in a 30 day span, and then I head to CA for more shows. Lisa!!! Don’t you know I have a World Cup to watch??? You’re totally screwing up my soccer watching schedule, Lisa. In her “spare time,” Lisa is also the Editor of North State Parent Magazine. So Lisa’s kind of a slacker, like the rest of the Noize crew. To book all eventz from now on, contact Lisa at email@example.com or 530-926-5232. Or you could just send her an email about how much you love the Canadian prog-rock band Rush. She will love you for it. (Lisa is one of approximately 127 females on the planet who love Rush. By contrast, approximately 37,564,127 males on the planet love Rush.) Welcome aboard Lisa!
(2) Multi-State Tour… And Beyond!
(Not to be confused with “To infinity… and beyond!”) Toy Story 3 is great, by the way — go see it. And no matter what my three babes might tell you (two action/adventure superhero daughters + their Ã¼berbabe muy fresca mamacita caliente), Dr. Noize did not cry twice during the last twenty minutes of Toy Story 3 when Andy goes off to college. Honestly, I’m much more of a man than that. I just had, um, some popcorn stuck in my eyeball or something. I did, however, inform my daughters after the film that if they grow any more, they’re grounded for life. That should do it. Anyway… I was in Wisconsin last week, I’ll be in Indianapolis at the world’s largest children’s museum this week, I play shows in Utah and Colorado the weeks after that, and then I’ll be in Northern CA. Check the Showz schedule and come join the musical party.
(3) Doctor Noize On IMAX!
Check this out: A few weeks back I played a show in an IMAX theater. This was, in and of itself, cool. The show was my monthly Giving Back charity show — in this case, it was for a group of fantastic preschools. In any event… During the show, we broadcast the Welcome To Grammaropolis video on the IMAX screen. It was BTA (Big Time Awesome). (That’s a new acronym I just invented; it is not trademarked at this time. Feel free to use it — also known as FFTUI.) The Grammaropolis single had a great run of several months on the national chart, which impacts my next story…
(4) Everybuddy In Whitewater, WI Is Noizemaker Of The Month!
That’s right, the entire citizenry of Whitewater, WI is Noizemaker Of The Month. Why? I’m glad you asked. I played shows in Wisconsin last week, and one of them was in Whitewater, because an old Stanford buddy lives there. It was probably the “farthest off the beaten path” I’ve ever played. I arrived at Whitewater with two stoopid misconceptions: (1) People in farm country in the outskirts of WI do not listen to satellite radio; (2) Those same people have certainly never heard of Dr. Noize. Well Noizemakers, this won’t be the first or last time you learn that I’m a bonehead. The show in Whitewater was a blast, and the people are amazing. Look at these kids up dancing with me onstage. Perhaps my fave moment: A family living in the rural area outside Whitewater demonstrated in great detail how even mom and dad know all the words to Welcome To Grammaropolis, courtesy of Sirius XM Kids Place Live radio, of which they are huge fans. The Mom had lots of ideas about how the song should be performed live — good ideas, too. I’ve been invited to return to Whitewater very soon, and a wise man never misses a chance to party with fun people.
(5) USA! USA! USA!
I know this Noizeletter is supposed to be dedicated to Dr. Noize news, but the whole Noize team loves soccer and therefore, by the transitive properties of (some sort of transitive properties), the World Cup is Dr. Noize news. Besides, watching the World Cup this year is like attending an amateur band concert where everyone has the same cheap plastic trumpet, half of them are inebriated, and they all play a single static pitch blasted for 90 minutes (plus stoppage time). It’s very John Cage. This hilariously barely-tolerable instrument is know in South Africa as the vuvuzela, and known to the rest of the world as “that never-ending drone that’s even worse than a Hasselhoff album” (except in Germany, where they like that sort of thing). But on to my call to action: All Noizemakers must watch the US play its pivotal Cup match versus Algeria tomorrow morning. Thank you for your attention to this matter. I will be wearing my Official US Jersey the Noizelets gave me for Father’s Day, and the girls and I are getting up early to go watch it on Webmaster Weldon‘s big screen. (Webmaster Weldon is the kind of guy who has things like big screens.)
Thanks from yer buddy for life,
P.S. Finally, after much discussion with co-coach Webmaster Weldon, here are The Doctor Noize Starting 11 for tomorrow’s match, because you wanted to know: Howard, Bocanegra, Hobbling Gooch (better than No Gooch), DeMerit, Cherundulo, Donovan, Bradley, Edu, Dempseydinho, Altidore, Cullinan. At halftime we sub Buddle in for Cullinan so Cullinan can kick back, eat five hot dogs with heavy mustard and watch the game. At 60 minutes we super-sub (note to Dr. Noize’s English-teaching mother: that is a verb in this case) Gomez to win the game in the 85th minute in dramatic fashion. Then it’s on to the next round. Thank you for playing and have a nice day.